Not a lot of people are aware of this, but did you know there is such a thing as an emotional scale in dating? It goes from 1 to 22, and it can be represented as a downward spiral of emotion, or maybe two: one upward scale from 7 to 1, and one downward one from 8 to 22. This indicates 22 different stages of emotion which you may identify with and which should indicate where you are in the relationship and how well you are doing.
This scale was created by Abraham Hicks, and before anything else, I want to illustrate it, so that we all know where we stand and what this looks like:
The scale is a representation of the emotional signs of the Law of Attraction, which is also for any aspect of your life, but what interests us is romantic relationships, so we’re going to stick to that. But what is this Law of Attraction and why is it relevant to your dating life?
Now, let’s talk a bit about the Law of Attraction. The concept is very complex, so I don’t have time or space to present it all here, but I can give you the gist of the whole thing. Basically, it says that your emotional well-being depends on your spiritual connection and the state of your emotions depends on the “vibrations” you feel.
But the most important lesson is that you have to project good vibrations. Do you know why? Because what you put out in the world is what you attract right back.
You’re upset, angry, hateful, and miserable? Don’t expect for your partner to be anything else.
If, on the contrary, you maintain a positive attitude, and you put good into the world, you can expect good back. At the end of the day, we circle back to an ancient bit of wisdom: you get what you deserve (usually).
This lesson is very important in the dating game because it teaches you how important the right attitude is, as well as why your relationships are not working.
In order to change your luck in love, you have to change yourself, first and foremost. Remember that what you offer is what you get back and that you can’t expect a number 2 on the scale for example, if all you can offer is a 20.
Be realistic about your expectations and work on yourself to improve yourself and what you have to offer a potential partner. Now, let’s learn how to use the law of attraction and the emotional scale in your favor.
If you can’t like yourself, no one will, and if you can’t do that, you won’t be able to truly like someone else, either. The most crucial relationship you can build is with yourself, so do not underestimate its importance in your life. If you need to take it step-by-step and learn to love little things about yourself, do it. And please know that you can’t have good luck in love until you learn to love yourself.
Shutting out the world is not going to get you very far; I think we can all agree with that. Why cut off your own foot? In order to attract compatible mates, you have to open your heart and your mind and be open emotionally to every possibility, no matter how unlikely it seems. You must learn to embrace the unexpected and the opportunities that arise out of nowhere. They are the most valuable tests.
Remember what I was saying about positivity? It’s the secret behind attracting good, healthy relationships with some amazing people. You have to want it badly enough, and you have to look towards it with excitement and an open heart.
Be optimistic towards your dating life and during the dates themselves. How do you expect to make a good impression or have a good time, unless you put your best foot forward and look at the situation with positivity? Embrace the yet unknown possibilities of this date and look forward to the wonderful things it can bring.
I hear a lot of men and women complaining that their lives are boring. “Nothing exciting or new ever happens to me! It’s always the same boring thing!”.
If you find yourself making the same complaint, stop to think – have you been actively trying to invite new things into your life? Have you ever tried stepping outside your comfort zone and doing something you’ve never done before, just to see what happens, or what changes in your life?
Maybe it’s time to try some new things and notice in what ways your life improves. Your dating life sure can’t suffer because of it.
We often make the mistake of thinking that we know everything and even worse, that the people we know and the people we meet are not valuable to us; that we have nothing to learn from them. I beg to differ, my friend – every single person you meet can teach you something about yourself and about life. We are all unique and have different views upon life. Inviting someone else’s worldview can change your own perspective in ways you haven’t yet imagined, so don’t close yourself off.
Don’t believe me? Learn what my emails can teach you about a man’s mind. I’ll see you on the other side.
Blayne Ketcham offers a ton of dating advice & a relationship program for women. After going through his free email-advice series, you'll understand how men think & what they truly desire. You'll also discover how to connect with any man using one simple method. This blog contains general thoughts and ramblings about relationship problems.